Ninja Cow Farm LLC

July 27, 2015July 27, 2015

Another cow who wasn’t happy, #44

Yesterday morning, as is normal on Sundays, I ran the farm by myself. I was extra by myself because normally I have Spork with me to help out but after being on vacation for a week at the beach he came home and immediately left to go stay with Grandma. No problem, I can get it done.

I started my morning about 2am because, well because. I got a lot done in my office, cleaning up and reorganizing because I’m setting my gunsmithing area back up to get a little work done. When the sun finally came up, I went out to move the cows and noticed that one of the cows looked like he might have bloat. I went ahead and moved everybody and started feeding the pigs. After about an hour I went back down and checked on him again and sure enough he looked even more bloated. Sigh, I guess I’ll add treating this cow to the list of things I have to do today. I built a corral lane out of temporary wire and grabbed my neighbor Dustin to help me move the cows into the barn yard and through the corral. We walked everyone in, except our sick cow who decided to jump the fence (must not feel too bad) and go for a run out into the open pasture. Everyone else was in the barn yard so we quickly sorted him back out and got him in with the rest of the group. A bit of work and we had him in the head gate.

Cow in head gate — #44 in the head gate waiting to be treated

This was Dustin’s first time treating for bloat so it was interesting for him to see what you do. I of course am the grizzled farmer/vet so I’m telling him what to do and how it works. After some quick home surgery I popped in the shiny new trocar and viol…. What the heck is that?!

Find out what went wrong in the next post

July 22, 2015July 28, 2015

#25 has a bull calf, #56

Normally when our cows have calves, they always have them at night or when we are not around. We go out to check on the cows and viola! There is a new calf. Today, #25 decided to have her calf right when we were there.

Cow having a calf — Cow #25 having her calf.

While it was nice of her to have her calf with us around, our actual involvement wasn’t any different. Make sure the calf is ok, is nursing, has been tagged and banded, and that is it.

#25 has been pregnant for what seems like forever and if you’ve been on a tour in the past few months, I’ve pointed her out as being huge and overdue. She wasn’t really overdue, we just didn’t know what her due date was and she was HUGE so we figured she was due any time now, for a couple of months. I’m glad she finally had her calf and that everything is ok.

#25s new little calf, just born.

July 22, 2015

A new calf, #55 is born to Sprinkles, #50

On Tuesday July 14th, I received a text message from SWMBO that one of the cows looked like she had become bloated. I was two hours away at gunsmithing school so I texted Miguel and asked him to go take a look. A little while later I checked in with him and yes she was bloated and he already had her in the head gate. We’d discussed what to do if we had any issues while I was gone and we’d agreed he’d just call the vet however Miguel decided he’d seen me put in a trocar enough times and he could do it. This was fine as I’d given him that option when we were making our plans.

I walked out of class and talked Miguel through the surgery, which was nerve racking for both of us and funny in hindsight. Miguel’s English is way better than my Spanish but there are still some words that are hard to understand occasionally, especially when you start using medical terms. After a few minutes Miguel was able to get the trocar installed and relieve the pressure on the cow. It turned out that the cow with bloat was one of our great momma cows, Sprinkles. The next day, Sprinkles surprised us and delivered this little cutie.

Baldy angus bull calf — #55, our newest little bull calf

Sprinkles normally calves in the fall. This little calf came early as a result of the bloat. However Sprinkles is a great mom and she is doing great taking care of him. He’s was definitely born early as he acts like a day old calf even a week later. He’s doing fine though and is keeping up with everyone else.

July 18, 2015December 17, 2016

Rebuilding and truing O/U shotguns

Browning Citori, completely disassembled.

As usual, whenever I’m away from the farm I don’t post anything about being missing. Even though we have a big white dog, Miguel and Vicente here, Dustin who is just down the driveway, an alarm system, and all the other things that make the farm hard to burgle, I still don’t advertise that I’m not here. Usually I’ll make a few posts ahead of time so that something is being posted in my absence. This time, however, I decided that I’d occupy my nights in the room by doing my posts while I was away. It would give me something to do and I could be a bit more creative since I’d have time.

When I arrived at the hotel I was staying at, I found that their internet was being provided by a bucket brigade apparently bringing the data one byte at a time. I also found that the hotel was pretty bad, like sleep with one eye open and a gun in your hand bad. So I didn’t really spend any time in the hotel unless I was asleep. The end result is I neglected you fine folks all week which is really a shame because we had a lot of really cool stuff going on to report on. I will be backfilling the posts so that everyone is caught up and we have all of our records. In the meantime, let me tell you where I was.

Browning Citori, all shined up and ready for shooting

I returned to Montgomery Community College to attend a NRA gunsmithing school on shotguns. The class was taught by Laurence Pylinski of Pylinski Arms Gunsmithing and was really good. It was a week long course and we rebuilt Browning Citoris, Blasers, Berettas, Kriegoffs, Kolars, and Perazzis. Since I’m not on the competition circuit, I concentrated on Brownings which is what I shoot anyway. I don’t work on guns that often so it’s better to get good at one thing than try to be decent at them all. I also had a Browning that really needed some work as the previous owner had pretty much messed it up. What you see in the picture above is the finished product.

This is what it looked like broken down. This gun had a complete annual. All the items that wear or are prone to failure were replaced. Everything was cleaned and lubricated. The stock was stripped, sanded, and refinished, the guns overall wear was checked, the timing of cocking and ejecting was checked, and the gun was polished, lubricated, and put back together. Now it’ll go back in the safe till I loan it or sell it. This gun actually doesn’t fit me that well and I shoot another Browning when I shoot but this one fits the average shooter so it’s good to have in case we take someone else shooting with us. Now I’ll move onto my normal Citori and do much of the same work to it. My next class in on AR-15/M4s and we’ll be converting from the standard .223 to alternative calibers which means I finally get to do some machine work at school. I picked .300 Blackout for my conversion because you can suppress that caliber very well. That’ll be another project after the gun is converted.

And don’t worry. I picked a different hotel this time, that has real internet so I can do some proper posting in my absence.

If you have a Browning that needs looking at, let me know. I don’t advertise my gunsmithing but I can look for friends and neighbors.

July 10, 2015July 10, 2015

Check out the cool eggs we got in

Spork holding quail eggs — Spork doing his Vanna White impression

One of our farmer friends dropped off some surprises for us today. We have quail eggs and guinea hen eggs in the fridge for your cooking pleasure.

I asked what they were used for. Guinea hen eggs are supposed to be awesome for baking and can be used just like regular eggs. A fact that my Google-Fu quickly confirmed.

So what about the quail eggs?

Seems they are awesome for something different. They taste normal but because they are so small and cute, they are best for garnish and as a topper, such as on top of a salad. Ready to wow your in-laws or amaze your kids this weekend? These things are the deal.

I only have a few of each so speak up if you want me to hold them for you.

I also have regular chicken eggs in the fridge if you want them, and of course all the meat you could ask for. I’m around most of today and all this weekend so if you want to come out and stock up, drop me a line. Next week is going to be tough so it’s better to get with me sooner rather than later.

July 5, 2015June 30, 2015

In case you didn’t get killed on your first visit to the farm, another take

Yesterday I posted about the Washington Post article on all the different animals that can kill you. Turned out pretty much everything, except sharks, was lurking on the farm and waiting to kill you. Despite the assurances that these number are still basically like getting struck by lightning, it still gives one the heebie jeebies.

Then the author followed up his post with another article on just where in the US are you more likely to get killed by these marauding bands of animals. Huh, so NC is 4th out of 50 states. But then the author slices and dices the data a bunch of different ways so I’m sure that tells a different story.

The first slice is deaths by other animals. Aha! Now we are nowhere near the top because…. Oh. Because there are more farms in the midwest and Texas and farms are where you get killed. Uh oh.

And then we see dogs. Everybody loves dogs and, oh, The Southeast leads the US in dog deaths.

And then bees, yep. We are the winner in bees too.

And snakes. Another winner there. Oh boy.

And lastly, “Other horrible venomous things.” Guess who is number one? The South. Oh goodie. I can see the Chamber of Commerce lining up to use this article in their recruitment brochures.

Fortunately, our author has a nice closure statement for everyone so they really do feel better. “In the end, it bears repeating: you are not going to get killed by an animal. Especially if you don’t work on a farm.”

Oh great, what about those of us who DO work on a farm?!

This entire post has been tongue in cheek if you cannot tell. Do farmers get killed more often by farm animals? Yeah sure. Do surfers get bitten more by sharks? Yep. Do pilots get killed in airplane crashes more often? Of course, how else did the plane get into the air. Office workers get paper cuts. Drinkers get liver damage. Sprinters get pulled ham strings. The things you do most often are more likely to result in an accident. It’s like the statistic that you’re more likely to get hurt at home, or more likely to have a car accident within X miles of your house. I’ll most likely die covered in frozen meat, surrounded by sales tax forms I can’t get filled out properly based on the way its going currently.

July 4, 2015August 27, 2015

Come take a tour, see the cute animals, and get killed

SWMBO sent me this article a while back on which animals are most likely to kill you. It was written in response to the shark attacks that happened of the NC coast. Since it was written, Jaws music has been playing rather routinely up and down our coast as our selachimorpha foes have taken up the challenge laid down by this article and their land bound cohorts to kill and maim as many of us as possible.

However, as the article points out, the sharks have a long way to go to catch up to their bovine peers as cows kill 20 people per year while sharks can only manage one.

I even learned recently it’s no bueno to be on the wrong end of an angry cow. So what other dangerous critters do we have on the farm.

Venomous snakes kill 6 people per year. Copper heads, water moccasins. Yep, got them.

Spiders kill 7 people per year.

Took this pic the other day. Spiders, check.

Non-venomous arthropods. 9 people per year. Yep, got ’em in spades.

Dogs kill 28 people per year. There is a dog in every house on the farm, two in most of them. Yeah, certain death there.

Other mammals kill 52 people per year. I think we have at least one of all the mammals that are native to NC. Spork even thinks he saw a black bear one time. Check.

Bees, wasps, and hornets kill 58 people per year.

Bee going into hive. — This little guy, and 10,000 of his friends, are now part of Ninja Cow Farm. I hope they stay a while.

We have four active bee hives we manage, plus native bees all over the farm. We also had a graduate student come down to study and collect our wasps, since we had plenty.

So if you go to the beach, you could be the one person who dies each year from a shark attack. If you come to the farm, you could be one of the 180 people who die from bees, cows, dogs, or whatever else you find on a farm.

Run!

July 3, 2015

We have all cuts of beef back in stock for your cookout!!

I’ve been telling everyone that we’d be back in beef by about September but last week we took three cows to the processor earlier than expected. Yesterday we picked up a little over 1000 pounds of beef from those three cows. That means that we have all the cuts available right now, T-bones, ribeyes, roasts, filets, and of course lots of hamburger. Plus skirt steak, flank steak, flat iron steak, etc, etc.

Freezer full of beef — Our newest freezer, chock full of beefy goodness

We brought in so much beef, that I had to order another freezer just to hold it all. Even with the new freezer in place, the freezers are pretty much jam packed.

We have two freezers that are full of nothing but beef for your selection. We also had the cows cut differently so that some have t-bones, some has filet mignon. We’ve never had this much choice at once so there should be something for everyone.

In addition to all the beef we now have for you, we also have a freezer full of farm fresh, grass raised chicken. We had to borrow part of this freezer to hold some beef, and some snack sticks for Neuse River Brewing Company, whom we are anxiously awaiting to open as we’ll be on their tasting menu!

A freezer full of pork — Our pork freezer, full and ready to go

We have bacon, break fast sausage, ground pork, Boston Butts, and BBQ all waiting for you. We also have a good selection of sausage still with more on the way. I also see some racks of ribs hiding there in the bottom.

Those are five different freezers full of meat. We’ve never had this much selection or quantify before. Lord willing we should be able to maintain this for the foreseeable future so if you’re looking for some protein for the dinner table, or something to grill out for the 4th of July, email me at dan@ninjacowfarm.com and let’s get you stocked up!

July 3, 2015June 30, 2015

What farm living and a good diet does for you

When I graduated high school, I weighed 212 pounds. I wasn’t really skinny (although I sure look skinny looking back on the pics) kind of a doughy computer gamer nerd. When I got out of college, I weighed about 222 pounds. I played volleyball, surfed, and drank lots of beer. The freshman 15 had never really left but I was still tall and relatively thin.

Bring on life, a desk job, business trips, sympathy pregnancy weight, etc. When I went on the diet SWMBO put me on, I weighed over 250 pounds. I really don’t know what I weighed when I started, 252-253 were the last times I’d looked, and it wouldn’t be at all surprising to find I was actually 255-260 when I started. When your weight goes nowhere but up, you stop weighing yourself because you don’t want new news as it is always bad. But on the diet I went and I dropped from over 250 to 205 or so. Then I sold my business and started farming full time. I don’t actively diet to loose weight anymore, I just diet to maintain. Last night I had a large snow ball at Pelican’s with the family. The night before, we had ice cream with whipped cream and a movie. I had seconds. However yesterday I ran the farm by myself on a gorgeous 80 degree day. I worked pretty much all day and didn’t have breakfast till noon. This morning I was greeted with this.

Under 200 pounds for the first time — Thank God it doesn’t round up!

I haven’t weighed less than 200 pounds since about 9th grade. I’m not trying to loose weight, and I eat all I want. But I’m tan, my back hasn’t felt this good in years, I see my kids every day, multiple times per day and can usually attend their events for the first time ever, and I’m at my lowest weight since I was a kid. If I could just figure out how to get paid to be a farmer, this would be the perfect life!

July 2, 2015June 30, 2015

Eeek!! A spider!

So the other day while I was compacting cardboard, I thought I saw movement in our baler. Meh, a bug or something. No big deal.

Then yesterday I’m helping Spork clean up some of the cardboard from feeding and I saw this in the exact same area.

This guy was riding the ram of the baler up and down as we compacted the cardboard. He was careful to keep out of the way of getting squished. It was obvious he’d made this trip many time before because he had it down to a science.

Because of all the fresh produce, we have lots of flies around so I’m happy to have a resident spider hanging out and eating bugs. And this guy looks like the Special Forces version of farm spiders.

Spork was totally nonplussed about the whole thing. He’d been watching this guy walk up and down the ram every time it went up and down. It seemed to be some mild entertainment for him while he worked. So Spork is entertained and bugs are going to a good use. Yeah spiders!

Um, yeah.

Stupid baler is made of steel and won’t burn! Anybody have a working flame thrower?